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Standing afar and sighting other people’s marriage may seem deceiving as some have disgusting realities they are facing, which never existed until they got into it.

Philanthropist Stacy M. Amewoyi, today, is throwing a word of caution to the young generation out there looking forward to getting married together with the married ones to uphold God in all things.

According to her, “everybody’s normal isn’t your normal; as a single person, you may be looking at a particular couple’s lifestyle and you would think it’s the normal thing to do but everybody has different realities when it comes to marriage.” Stacy revealed.

ALSO READ :Signs that show he’s fed up with you/relationship.

In citing some realities in some marriages, the she indicated that, most homes face dominant situations, where the other spouse treats the other like a servant by making all the decisions and acting like the boss who defines all roles. Others also face the isolation process, which comes along with the control of whom to talk to as well as deliberate misunderstandings, the limiting of outside involvement and jealousy.

In some cases, there is the use of economic abuse which prevent one from working and as a result, have no choice than to lean always on the other for money. When the table turn for the other to work, the latter takes all the money-making no room for the other to access the family income. Children are not left out as they are also used as a means to relay messages, putting the other spouse in guilt or at times threatened to have children taken away from them.

Stacy revealed “emotional abuse is the worst of its kind. In using this kind of abuse, the victims are made to feel bad about themselves after the mind games have been played which results to name calling and humiliation. When the abuser is drawn to this behavior, they tend to make light of the situation, shifting blames and responsibility on the victim without paying attention to their concerns.”

She believes that, common interests among spouses, go a long way to a grounded marriage if taken into consideration during the dating process. She mentioned that, at least, there should be a thing that both spouses enjoy, which can bring them together even at the most heated brawl.

READ ALSO :If he or she can’t answer these 20 questions genuinely,don’t marry him or her

She says interest in football, movies, music, church etc. has an input in the boosting of marriage such that, there is always something to discuss after the day. The individual differences in interests, tend to put the other off and at times is forced to either go to sleep or walk out of the home. This, if not addressed quickly, creates unexpected outcomes which could lead to unhappiness in the marriage.

“Every wife is a good material only if the husband is a good tailor. Marriage is not easy; neither is it always fun; those built on physical attraction are not likely to survive a long-term. Are you ready to admit your faults and apologies? You are ready to act the you when what you expected of the marriage really isn’t and will you give in your all to make it work? Don’t rush into a legally binding commitment until you are sure, that is what you truly want.” Stacy advised.

Simon Kabutey
Simon Kabutey
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